Love Boat

Boat

I want to sail to my love
Over the rough seas,
In my little love boat
To him, I’ll be safe

And then we’ll sail
Over the rough seas
But it won’t matter
Coz he’ll be with me

In my little love boat
We’ll try and stay afloat
The world will not matter
As long as we are together

Soon we’ll see
What fools we’ve been
To stay apart for so long
Oh why, didn’t we see it before

In my love boat
To, where we’ll sail
To happier times and lovely memories
Oh, how happy we’ll be.

Call or Text

In today’s world is talking and texting the same? Do they imply the same thing. Can a friendship/relationship exist through just texting?

If you were to ask me I’d say no way. You need to see eye-to-eye to suss out hidden meaning, body language, having a healthy relationship in all cases. But in this day and age many people meet online, geography no longer being the defining factor to consider. They chat via skype, whatsapp, wechat, etc. (Skype here counts as seeing someone but again come on its skype – the first 10 minutes of every conversation goes like ‘Can you hear me properly’ and ‘I can see you, can you see me’).

In our busy lives many times, I find myself just texting people to find out plans, catch up, etc. But the point is we have met at some point. How do we behave in front of people who we have never seen before in the flesh. Do we behave with the same familiarity that happens after chatting with someone for a while or do we act all coy and shy and pretend it is your first meeting? (which it is).

Well, I am writing all this because I happen to be a relationship at the moment which is super long distance, I am literally talking seven seas. And we only keep in touch through text. No calls, no painful goodbyes, no awkward silences. I like it because I like my freedom and independence. And it would make me miss him terrible every time we spoke. I think for both of us, it is about avoiding this pain.  But again I cant help but think is this normal? If we are in love, then how come we are happy living our separate independent lives without it being an issue. Doesn’t love mean wanting to be with someone all the time? Do we even really love each other at all? Or is just texting a couple of times a week enough? Sometimes I feel like chatting all night till he pulls out the annoying acronym ‘ttyl’, and sometimes I dont feel like chatting at all.

But if love is there then it doesnt matter right.

The problem is we are both a bit lax about it. We feel that things will just get sorted on their own, by not acknowledging things it makes it go away. That’s usually our philosophy. But what if tomorrow someone else comes along, the question we are not asking today is when does it stop, how will it end. Are we prepared to lose each other to someone else, someone who would win in matters of geography over matters of the heart?

Forever lonely

I am sick and tried of being lonely. I want to share my life with someone who will be with me even if it is just once a week. Right now I am just not happy with my super long distance relationship status. And especially when I see other couples together, I just dont know what I am doing. And then we dont communicate much, a message here an email there.He doesn’t like it. But what about me?

I love him, I do but sometimes it just gets too much. My relationship status is so vague that when people ask about it, I just say I am single, because I dont want to tell a long winded story of how I have come to be in this situation. And then people think I am crazy or a lesbian. It just gets lonely, I too want someone to talk to and hang out with.

And now I am in this situation where I am stuck. My committed status stops me from meeting other potentials (I’d hate to cheat on him) while I do not have any of the perks of being in a relationship.

We both love each other but there is no way of making it work. Since we both live in different countries and since we cant see a solution, we dont talk about it. We go on holidays but in real life there is no solution, since we both work in jobs we enjoy in our respective countries.

I guess eventually one of us will have to move that is if we continue but I dont want the pressure of all that falling on our relationship. Also, that person is probably going to be me 😦

I just dont know whether to continue or not. Life just gets tough at times.